A few blogs ago I mentioned planning thanksgiving in Santa Fe with the one person I found on social apps that didn’t want to just have sex with me.. Well, I was wrong, a day before making my drive to Santa Fe I asked this person for some information, anything. He would not send me a photo of his ID or give me his full name. Things started to fall apart after that, his story varied, his intentions came through, and I soon realized I was dealing with a creepy person. I am a strong man, able to take care of myself, but I can’t beat up chloroform, so the whole idea of Santa Fe lost my interest. I was proud of how I handled things and called him out on his bullshit, as well as my new ability to recognize the toxic and not wanting to go near it. So.. I made the best modification to my journey while keeping the goal as priority. I will be spending thanksgiving with my newly acquired family from my brothers recent wedding. I am staying with Bob (my brother’s wife’s cousin) and Mindy (his wife), in Carlsbad New Mexico. They have a beautiful home and have given me another opportunity to upgrade and recharge. But before getting to Carlsbad, while driving south, I spent a day exploring Chaco Canyon, a natural historic park in north west New Mexico. Chaco Canyon was a major center of culture for the ancient pueblo peoples between 900 and 11150 AD. This area contains the largest collection of ruins north of Mexico. You are able to walk among the ruins scattered for miles within the park system. And remember, because it’s a national park, in most cases you are able to camp as well. Even spending most the day at Chaco Canyon. I was not able to see all the ruins, but I was able to see the 3 largest and most impressive. And in those ruins, I felt something beautiful being given to my soul. Standing in the cultures of our past awakens something inside you. The heart and brain are in eclipse at those moments and you understand peace again. I feel that Chaco Canyon gave me transcending spiritual moment. After meditating and breathing in their history while among the ruins, I learned how to harness my practice, and focus my energy. I close my eyes, and breath in the light. Visual, I breath in rainbows, as I draw my inward breath, I take in rainbows through my nose and into any one negative area that needs love and attention. As I exhale I visualize dark smoke out my mouth and from the focused area. I breath intensely for 20 to 30 breaths, while focusing my practice. Afterwards, I’m happily content and genuinely feel better and stronger with each meditation. The ruins at Chaco Canyon reaffirmed within myself that I am in control. We are the kings, we choose how to rule the complexities of our body and mind. Do you rule with honor or deceit within yourself? The many ego driven personalities we have inside ourselves are the loyal subjects inside our kingdom, or the slaves trying to break through the walls. Do you have enough knights to protect your weaknesses? Do you have too many, therefore no one gets through your walls? This internal battle within me was fought while among the ruins at Chaco Canyon, and thanks to a few generations of ancient spirits, I’ve become a stronger, more peaceful ruler within my kingdom. After Chaco Canyon I traveled to Carlsbad Caverns National Park in southern New Mexico, located in the Guadalupe Mountains. Hidden beneath the surface are more than 119 known caves – all formed when sulfuric acid dissolved the surrounding limestone leaving behind caverns of all sizes. They have almost 30 miles of cave systems, and some of the largest rooms in the world. The cave was alive, yet beautifully silent. The quite you feel while in the depths of the earth, can sometimes be too loud for the weak minded, but if you can connect with that silence between the void, you can amplify your meditation and find places within yourself you didn’t know existed. You can mentally go deeper within yourself with every drop of water falling down from a Stalactite, demanding for attention in the silent dark. When you are miles below the surface you are cut off from the world. No service, no noise, no commotion from the connected world, yet I’ve never felt more connected with Mother Earth, and myself. She has shown me how truly unconnected I was from her. And within the darkness of her womb, she gave me back my light. After my second life changing experience I had another mountain to climb. Guadalupe Peak is the highest place in Texas, and only a few hours from where I was staying in New Mexico. The peak is at around 8,700 feet. (More than double Mount Marcy, the highest peak in New York, in the Adirondack Mountains) Beginning the climb I pass a family, we share hellos, and while passing I hear the son ask his father why they aren’t going as fast as me.. The father chuckles out his reply; because you’re on my back son. I turned around and shared a laugh with the family, then continued my break neck pace, although I do stop and take in every beautiful moment that speaks to me in the wild, which negates my pace, but gives me more opportunities for wonder. While climbing to the top of this mountain, during a simple 5 minute meditation, I called upon my spirit animal. Shortly after, I came upon about 25 mountain birds. They flew and fluttered around me, almost accompanying me along the way up.  As we entered into a clearly between 2 cliff edges, I come within eye contact of 2 big horn sheep. This moment transcended me yet again, and I wasn’t even at the peak. I don’t climb mountains because they are simply there, I climb them because I am here. I am not climbing these mountains to achieve something, I am climbing them to learn something more about myself. The Gods we have within ourselves shine brighter at the tops of the world. That mysterious wisdom flows through you easier as you feel your massive insignificance when surrounded by the mountain, while standing at the peak. The top of Guadalupe was extreme, with strong, cold winds that even the heat of the sun couldn’t stop from chilling  through your bones. I looked for rock ledges and corners in the sun with plenty of thermal energy built up from the morning’s heat. The wind was above me with the sun on my face as I sat in my warm little corner and thanked God for my meaningful life. After about 2 hours at the peak I began my decent. On my way down, the encouragement I gave to other hikers on their way up, but contemplating turning back actually helped one women continue her journey. Passing that energy to others, giving them the extra push to the next level never once emptied my bucket. In fact, my bucket overflowed with gratitude and loving energy. My goal was accomplished, to come back stronger from the top, not just to climb the mountain, but to meditate and prey and be thankful while at the peak. So with those previous amazing adventures concentrated into my soul, and being one day away from the last full moon before winter, I decided to spend it at White Sands National Monument. Rising from the heart of the Tularosa Basin is one of the world’s great natural wonders, the glistening white sands of New Mexico. Great wave-like dunes of gypsum sand which has engulfed 275 square miles of desert, creating the world’s largest gypsum dune field. So now with 3 recent major life altering events influencing a great part of me; bringing me into ancient ruins, going from the depths of the earth to the highest peaks, I was ready for my slate to be cleaned. And the vast beauty of White Sands did just that. Walking the Alkine Flat trail, in bare feet, while the sun sets, during the last full moon before winter, gave me a chance to let go of the negative things from my past. I sat alone at the top of a dune, away from everything, but a more complete part of that great everything than ever before. I wrote in the sand emotions I’ve let go of, so they could be blown away before I begin my new life. As the full moon began to rise I was given a since of direction. We are more powerful than we pretend to be. It’s just easier being weak. Nothing can compare to this kind of beauty and clarity, when it’s right in front of you, it’s everything. I won’t dishonor the greatest most beautiful moon I’ve ever experienced with a picture. But I do so very much love this amazing world.. To the moon and back. I am ready. The universe is ready. And I can feel the connection to that next level. Something amazing is about to happen.

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